Because I feel Blessed

Lord I feel so renewed…
So much happened today for me. I was able to finally detach myself from someone toxic from my past and start leaving myself open for someone who truly deserves my attention, my genuine love I consciously chose to give to someone who didn’t deserve but an ounce of it. And I gained a new layer of understanding my purpose and desires for my lifetumblr_lu5xrqCMoz1r3iceno1_500

I feel like I got baptized
I feel like after weeks of the pounding and panging, the blacksmith lifted his hammer to reveal something altogether foreign to this world, something new, something new and something good. After weeks of Plutonian hell, I’ve surrendered and I’ve risen from the ashes of what I once was

Flying far above the charred visage disaster zone, I can see clearly all the evolution that’s taken place within me and I’m proud of myself. I mean I’ve gotten myself through such hells it’s a literal miracle I’m here

I recognize my power, my raw strength,
and this is coming from a woman who evolved from a girl to a teenager who, without any semblance of exaggeration, felt herself worthless and weak, powerless in every sense of the word, unworthy of the most bare of essentials to basic life let alone anything of soul, anything derived from my searing and soothing passion and the fire the fire, the fire that keeps me whole

Getting myself from here to there was the most hellish of rides,

but I chose it
and I did it.
I did it with my own hands, the powerful light of my spirit, my refusal to settle for anything less than what I desire with utmost totality of soul, my ability to withstand mental-emotional-spiritual Hadean bleakness so void of all, even coalblack darkness, I questioned if there was any light at all for me I’d find, my ability to look my darkness in the eyes and simultaneously surrender to the glaring truths of my broken states and refuse to let myself remain, my willpower, my passion, my intensity, but most of all, I have to thank Dea and my spirit guides and the ones who have kept me here alive despite those moments I surrendered to my brokenness and I refused my power to rage against the currents’ demands, to see beyond such Hadean dimmed out no sun, no moon, no stars, and when I finally found the door, they wouldn’t let me pass, not even once and not even twice…,the ones who melded me with such unshakeable feeling even in the drowning of intoxicant that there’s a reason I chose this, sealed with my flesh all for my remembrance every time I reached out for the door, and the ones who relentlessly shouted their messages to me until I was ready to listen

The Plutonic Journey, Rising the Phoenix Vulnerable and Empowered her Raw, Core truths Bared to the Cosmos

My theory is that we’re all meant to go through the Plutonian journey and I was responding to someone who felt only certain individuals were meant to and then it spurred this massive realization about Pluto partially in thanks to my beautiful sister who’s heavily Scorpionic and Plutonian

(this will be revised, but as of right now, it is a stream of consciousness)

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Everyone goes through that process of having subconscious blockages brought to light. Going through a process of digging through our darkness because what’s there has power over us as long as we don’t face it and own our darkness. That’s just the trial of life. Pluto symbolizes that process, but we all have Pluto’s presence in us somehow

Before I knew a thing about astrology, I was very passionate about transformation myself, facing my darkness, my truths hidden in my consciousness, learning from it so as to reclaim my power. I was also very much aligned with the ‘Phoenix rising from the ashes’ motif. I was very heavily involved with Plutonian themes like destruction, death, going as deep as possible, to the core, the raw core no matter how much it hurt, pain, my shadow. And I’ve always been very obsessive as well, especially with these concepts

But I also had Plutonian issues of control and projecting my feelings of powerlessness onto others

In all honesty, I’m very Plutonian energetically, yet I’m not sure I’d be considered Plutonian astrologically. So I do think we all are meant to go through this process. That’s what growth is all about, we’re not meant for stagnation. We’re all meant to dig through the meat, the rotting necrotic flesh of us and bring it back to life. We’re all meant to experience countless little deaths and destructions so as to recreate ourselves

I do believe that’s what Pluto’s about. That’s why people who don’t do the work are likely to project their feelings of powerlessness out into the world

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Before I knew anything about astrology or Pluto, I was very very passionate about and aligned with Plutonian energy. But I still don’t know if my chart would reflect that Plutonianism. So I’m definitely convinced we’re all meant to go through that process

People have even thought I must be a Scorpio rising before. And I’ve been noted as having Plutonian energy, but I’m not sure if people would actually consider me Plutonian looking at my chart

So I wonder why I’d be so heavily Plutonian if it’s not reflected in my tropical chart nor my sidereal chart. Actually, in sidereal, I’m a Scorpio NN, but I still don’t think that accounts for how heavily Plutonian I am energetically. It just raises many questions and I truly do believe we’re meant to all go through this process of delving into the deepest aspects ourselves, destroying what isn’t ours and isn’t real and carrying with us what is real, finding our power in the destruction, our light in the darkness

I think this is an important discussion… Perhaps we’re all meant to explore the themes of every planet regardless of their presence in our charts. And Pluto is such a vital, very very human planet symbolically
This discussion is getting meaty and real, I love it
I truly believe we must all go through this

I only just came to this realization. I’ve been wondering why I’m so Plutonian yet it’s not reflected in my chart…

It’s highly possible that we’re all meant to experience the journeys represented by each planet, but various life circumstances can trigger different planets to become more prominent at various points in life

For instance, I went through a lot of trauma growing up and I was forced to delve into my darkness and use it to find my power because of that

Is Pluto misunderstood? Perhaps so. It’s considered a malefic, but what if the malefics are just some of the most crucial energies to our development? They’re just more likely than other planets, potentially, to become outwardly destructive because they represent such intense processes

Might Pluto be associated with love? Perhaps so. Once we start digging into our subconscious, we feel powerless to all this energy within us. How we handle it is part of our Plutonian journey. If we’re caught up in feelings of powerlessness and trying to find our power, we may not be able to purely love others until we work through these issues. Yet once we do, love may be much more pure and truly intimate as others are no longer a threat to our power

My Scorpio super stellium sister has recently come to many realizations about love and embraced it, as an example. She’s EXTREMELY scorpionic and as a matter of fact, she has an Aries moon so she’s very Martian as well. Yet her journey has led her to embracing love. And not just ordinary love, but this piercing, allencompassing love that strikes through all of humanity. She now preaches to ‘look for the love’ and she believes that what everyone does is ultimately about love and seeking it

Does Pluto rule death? Perhaps it rules our grapplings with the unknown, what we perceive as beyond us and thus more powerful than we are solely because we don’t understand it. But through the harsh journey of coming to terms with death and what it means, we come to understand life. If we follow the path as painful as it may be, we ultimately reach a point where we no longer feel powerless and so we can approach life as vulnerable creatures without defense, without mental, spiritual, emotional, or even physical weapons because we no longer need to. Strength in vulnerability. And in this state where we feel no need to project any latent feelings of powerlessness upon others, and in this state where we no longer perceive possible threats ready to overpower us at any moment, we arise like the Phoenix with all that is not us destroyed, dusted, ashed, and what we are is our core selves. Our core, true, raw selves are able to give and receive true love, not love laced with the shards of these power struggles

And it dawned on me that Pluto’s journey from planet, to dwarf planet, to planet in terms of NASA’s standards is highly symbolic, the proverbial phoenix rising from the ashes. Pluto is small and vulnerable and yet immensely powerful

 

 

 


So perhaps Pluto is about love, or more accurately, vulnerability which allows love to flow purely